The Ten Commandments of Self....

Today's post I am borrowing from a friend, with permission, Mary Costanza wrote the Ten Commandments of Self and she says it so much better than I could ever say it.  However, my commentary is in the italics under each one. 

The Ten Commandments Of Self

1. I shall not hide, be ashamed or embarrassed of who I am. I shall embrace everything about me. My imperfections, age, beauty, talents, intelligence, all of it.

 

This includes the times when I am tired and start to stutter, and when I feel like that girl on the tv commercial that says, "Use Your Words" to the door-to-door salesman.  I would love to use my words sometimes, but they just wont come out.  It also includes the times when I have to go slower. Slower than I normally would because this is the new way that I operate.  I'm no longer in the fast lane.  Call me a slowpoke or whatever, but my body doesn't go that fast anymore.

 2. I shall not hide the pain that I have experienced, I will acknowledge it, work on it, and learn from it and let go. I shall not keep it buried deep down inside of me anymore.

I'm all for being transparent.  I've tried my best to be that way here.  I will always show the whole side of everything, the good, bad, and ugly.

 3. I shall not speak words of negativity about myself. I am whole, and yes, life may have wounded me, but I am whole. The wounds need time to heal, I shall be patient with myself during this process, and give myself as much time as I need.

This one is super hard for me.  I have a lot of frustration with myself daily.  Minute-by-minute is a new journey.  But it is one that I am taking.  I will not just say, "well, strokes suck, time to curl up and die now."

 4. I shall speak words only of kindness, words that empower, words of compassion and love to myself daily, even on the toughest day when I am angry at myself. I shall have unconditional love for myself.

Another super tough one.  Mary really is pushing my limits here.  I mean, I just agreed to be positive and now she wants me to be kind and show myself unconditional love.  I have had a talk with her and think that she may be asking a bit much on this one, but I will try. 

 5. I shall nurture my heart, mind, body and soul. I shall create an environment both inside and out that is supportive, loving and no judgmental. I will feed my heart and soul with love, and fuel my body with nutritious foods , and exercise it daily. I shall feed my mind only with thoughts that provoke curiosity and wonder and strive to seek the answers.
I'm learning to do this.  It is definitely easier said than done.  But, let's just say I have the provoking curiosity and striving for answers part down pretty well. 

 6. I shall not take the negativity that others say so personally, everyone has an opinion about me, but that opinion does not define who I am.
Ouch.  This one is super duper hard.  I think that Mary may be overstepping the line here.  But, I'm willing to give it a try.  After all, I'm a people pleaser.  How can I not take opinions personally. 

 7. I shall give myself rest, forgiveness, and attention.

Rest.  Okay, I got this one.  Trust me, my pillow and I have become close friends over the past several weeks.  Forgiveness.  Yeah, we'll glide over that one.  I have a lot of screw ups.  Attention...okay Mary, really?  Attention.  no thanks.

 8. I shall learn my limits and say “No” when feeling overwhelmed, without guilt and shame.
Well, this one, dear friends, is going to happen whether I like it or not.  The Warden will make the "saying NO" part happen even if I don't/can't.  The without guilt and shame part is a different story but Dr. S and I are working on this one so that The Warden doesn't have to step in and so that I can do it all by myself.

 9. I shall not allow others to dictate my decisions; I am strong enough to make my own.
This kind of goes in line with #8.  Dr. S and I are working on it.  I am very strong but I cave in to guilt trips a lot and those are vacations that I don't want to, nor need to take any longer.

 10. I shall no longer beat myself up about past decisions, choices and mistakes that I have made, because now I realize they were lessons that had to be learned. I shall have no regrets.
God has an interesting way of using the very last one.  I am still learning.  This whole journey has been a lesson that I am not sure I will graduate from any time soon.  But, for today, I will accept it.  And that's really all I can do.  Just today.  Tomorrow, however, is a different story.  ;)